Superman Returns-Critical Review. S-word style..

REN speaks:

Which girl wouldn't want to be swept away by Superman?

If you don’t,… think about it. Think about the sex.
Mr. Man of STEEL, BUNS of STEEL, COCK of steel…will be fucking you in mid air.
Oh.... and the Speed… speed will be a good thing in this case.. as long as kryptonite is not in the room. You’ll never have to worry about him going limp, ever.

His laser eyes will blast through the puki!



But not to worry, ‘cos he, can BLOW. His super ice breath will put the flames out, before firing up another explosive O. Hahahaha..

No wonder Lois was still hung up on him after 5 years of abandonment!!!

The love triangle... no, actually the romantic sub-plot turned into a love square..
(Lois, Superman, Richard, and let's not forget... Clark. )

These characters actually represent a few real-life human traits and the choices people face with in their love lives.

let's analyze:

Superman:

-workaholic: reporter by day, world savior by night.
-he never wanted Lois to love him for his superpowers…
but for who he really is.. i.e. Clark Kent.

Clark Kent:

-When is HE ever going to learn that monosyllabic conversations and wistful looks wasn’t going to help him get any action?

Richard White:

-living with the fact that he might be second best.

Lois Lane:
-choices, choices, choices... what should she do?
-obsessed with Superman and blind to Clark's advances, she settles for Richard.
it was probably the smartest thing to do. Settle for something real, even if it probably means less-than-amazing sex. But she remains apprehensive about marrying Richard. Why? Maybe because she was cursed with good cock 5 years ago.

If I could talk to Lois, this is what I would tell her..

- Girl, it’s time for you to see beyond the glitz and glamour of being a superhero's wife. Sure the fuck was great. But you’ll be working around his schedule. And if ever you get the rare chance to heat things up in the bedroom, the workaholic gets a call from work and flies off.



- while settling for Richard might be more stable and secure, realize that there might be consequences. Trouble is, you know better. You know how better cock can be. So trust me, cheating is likely. Well, you kissed Superman, didn’t you?



- And honey, did you ever think that you might have overlooked someone? He could be just hiding behind a pair of glasses.



He once gave up everything he had for you (Superman II). But MORE importantly, if you gave him AND yourself a chance, this unassuming friend of yours could jolly well be endowed with a similar explosive package.



Open your eyes Lois, Open your eyes…