life is not what i thought it was 24 hours ago...

I've been having trouble staying asleep for close to 1 month now. I toss and turn in bed all night and wake up looking like hell. I tried ways and means to get better sleep.. comfy quilts, more pillows, mood lighting but somehow nothing works. Binging on alcohol is a sure way to pass out but that cannot be a long term solution. Definately.

To my surprise, i woke up feeling more rested that i've even been this morning.

The thing is : I wasn't in my own bed.

The scent of a certain man i've loved before consumed me completely. The textures of his bed linen, his two pillows and how his hand always rested on the small of my back as i slept were all strangely familiar and in its place.

Comfort is when a man fits like an old shoe. Even though you've seen everything, its never gets boring. Talking in bed, The giggles, the laughter and the singing. and yes.. sex becomes optional at this point.

His face lights up when he tells me something new, the small frown he has when i talk during foottie matches on TV but the best has to be the way his face looks in the morning.
Lost but contented.

This man is a bad habit of mine.
i leave, he runs after me. i stay.
I forget, he jolts my memory. i remember.
__________________________________________________________________

I’m having trouble sleeping
You’re jumping in my bed
Twisting in my head
Leave me

I’m having trouble breathing
You’re sitting on my chest
I sure could use the rest
Leave me

It’s you Why’s it always you and never me?
I’ve never dared to let my feelings free
Why’s it always you and never me?
I’ve never cared too much about honesty
I’m having trouble sleeping
I’m thinking of what you said
About the tears been shed
Leave me