Borderline Lesbians Part X

*a few nights ago, the s-wordsisters brought new meaning into the acronym, BRB.

Ruby hadn’t been feeling horny for awhile, while Ren was at her peak.
Ren has been trying to fix her puki.



REN:
Horribly horny

RUBY:
plan and conquer

REN:
but no one i would actually fuck. maybe I should do a force fuck.. just close my eyes, clench my teeth, and say.. "okay! let's go!"

RUBY:
i wanna do a force fuck
do it .. but i need some one to kiss me SHIOK SHIOK make out

REN:
yeah me too

RUBY:
like MADDDDD like MAAAAADDDD

REN:
Sigh.. All UKs.. (=UNFUCKABLE KOTEK)

RUBY:
think think .. my aussie big kotek won't be back in sg till next week. fuck lahhhh .DIY till then.. where is my damn shower head.. :P

REN:
Puki throbbing.. cannot babe.. i need a stable cock

RUBY:
shut up. fuck means fuck. get off then figure out the cock

REN:
Yeah.. you’re my PR manager.. i give you commission. a fuck

RUBY:
u dun regret :P

REN:
Can i trust you.. don't find me a lardass. haha

RUBY:
after 6 months wahaahaha .. u want an FF (FUCKABLE FACE)

REN:
I do want a FF .. can i trust you or not .. sekali you bring me Danny
(one of the guys whom Ruby always wanted Ren to fuck to put the guy out of his misery.)

RUBY:
can lahhh!

REN:
puki

RUBY:
wahahahahaa

REN:
SACK.. Bad PR skills this time..

RUBY:
call Danny and arrange.

REN:
fuck you

RUBY:
so pissy today? wahahaha
suddenly i am horny

REN:
i'm horny.. don't mess with me

RUBY:
so am i man.. i would strip topless

REN:
how come you're suddenly horny .. me too. let's strip. let's msn topless

RUBY:
Wahahahahaa.. SET. but u have no web cam. how would it work

REN:
Yeah.. Don’t have one..

RUBY:
how would i know ur kNow ur for real.. me buy for ur b-day
Okok.. i am taking my top off.. wahahaha

REN:
Haha.. wait.. me too.... off! chilly man hha

RUBY:
off... waahahahaha

REN:
this is funny

RUBY:
yeah... feels so weird..

REN:
i know

RUBY:
i am looking at my window

REN:
suddenly I don't know what to say

RUBY:
i gotta say.. my boobs loook nice. just the light hitting it.. i look in the mirror.. looks hot man..

REN:
you want me to fuck you or what..

RUBY:
i slap any man who doesn't get turn on by this. khalllas in an instant
but seriously i am half naked in front of the screen..feeling damn liberated

REN:
me tooooo!

RUBY:
i am wondering.. how soft hands would feel exploring my body .taking their time..
moving up and down..

REN:
one day me shall try... for real.. not for fun anymore.. haha
If you want me to fuck you, just say so man! Stop teasing me..

RUBY:
yeah man... sensual grabs. fuck my face for real!

REN:
i tell you.. Don’t you regret .. face kena drown in puki juice

RUBY:
Wahahaha.. what regret.. experience man! wahahahaa at least will have u to panic! wahahaha

REN:
heehee you can give me that for my birthday.. a face fuck. no need to spend money

RUBY:
wahahahaha

REN:
both giggling coming out of the room.. Heeeheeeeheeeheee…

(heeheeheeeheee=Ruby giggled like a schoolgirl when Ren teased her the other day.. It stuck since then. So when Ren pushes her right buttons, she giggles that way uncontrollably)

RUBY:
an idea wahahahaha or it could go both ways! best thing we ever done! wahahaha

REN:
yeah!

RUBY:
hahahha
man!!!!! this is exciting.. i forgot i am topless

REN:
yeah even i forgot

RUBY:
yeah.. i so need a fuck.. my naked boobs... are turning me on! wahahaha\ first time my boobs are naked and nobody is doing anything abt it..

REN:
raba yourself (raba-raba = malay sexual slang for feel/grope)

RUBY:
doesn't work that way i want WINANRO his big hands

REN:
he'll lift you up and fuck you in mid air

RUBY:
yeah man!
DO ME DO ME! DO ME DO ME
heeeheeeeheeeheeee
i cannot take it..
gimme a few minutes. need some release

REN:
haha fucking yourself?? Really? let me guide you heehee ok go scream loud

RUBY:
brb

(15 minutes later)

RUBY:
back

REN:
So all good???

RUBY:
yeah man!

REN:
Basket.. haha

RUBY:
YEAAAAAAAAAHHH

REN:
so long .. but oh yeah.. it’s like that after drinks

RUBY:
couldn't resist

REN:
haha

RUBY:
feel soooooo goooooodddd now. ahhhh if only there was a man beside me! can raba him! SHIOK!

REN:
Basket.. I’m jealous.. ok.. my turn

RUBY:
ok. go i am still naked from top up :P

REN:
ok you wait brb

RUBY:
ok. i will wait. set!

REN:
fuck man!!! I’m laughing.

RUBY:
hahahaha

REN:
okok,, calm down,, me start
nnnnnow.. brb

(10 minutes later)

REN:
back
Woah.. panting.. damn difficult man… after drinking
lardass and cousin beeping on MSN weren’t helping either. Distracting..

RUBY:
Waahahaha. tell him what u been up too! sure sit up straight :P

REN:
Maybe YOU would tell him.. Lardass is no-way for me.
Wait.. feel like one more go.. wait.. still unfinished
ok back.. Hooo!

RUBY:
Shiok la! After masturbating, now can concentrate

REN:
yeah

RUBY:
i want my winandro! ape saje

REN:
i still need my Gucci RUSH perfume.. Need .. Need.. Need..

RUBY:
that was what i was going to get for u b-day! the rush perfume..

REN:
Oh! hahaha i can see why u said it has something to do with fuck too.. I think it’s because I said I will fuck the person who gave me that perfume.. Again, if you want to fuck me, say so… don’t expect me to read these subtle messages....

Borderline Lesbians Part IX

*take note start and end time of this section of the conversation..
s-wordsisters were simply saying "goodnight"

--start--
8/19/2006 11:30:13 PM

Ruby comes home from dinner, and Ren from drinking.
After 5 minutes on MSN,

RUBY:
ok.. me talk to u tomorrow.. i am feeling a little off!

REN:
ok

RUBY:
nite nite puki! even though me feeling a little off... ME STILL LOVE U LOTS LOTS OK! wahahaha (sent the wink "Kiss")

REN:
heeeeheeeheeeheee

RUBY:
serious.. dun think i ever sayang a girl that much man! cibai u! wahahaha

REN:
me the cheeeebai!

RUBY:
talk to u tomorrow.. after my meeting i hope.

REN:
oh yeah.. poor puki

RUBY:
yeah.. need infilling! :P

REN:
okie.. good night.. kiss kiss your forehead.. tucking your breasts in

RUBY:
hehehehehehehehee * giggle* giggle* thank you. ur hands so warm..

REN:
always... :P don't want your susu to catch a chill.. kiss kiss the susu.
(susu=slang for breasts in malay)

RUBY:
yeah later shrink u cry! wahahahahaa

REN:
wet dreams!

RUBY:
ok lahhh! say goodnite to each other so long!

REN:
haha

RUBY:
how disgusting!

REN:
i know!

RUBY:
kekekkee

REN:
if it's kotek, it's just bye

RUBY:
u should blog this... :P how we say goodnite..

REN:
now we know... 5 min before going to sleep, we must start saying bye

RUBY:
its true.. with koteks.. its like good nite. BYE. LATER .. Cheebai.. that's it.

REN:
Haha.. This puki must kiss head.. Susu..

RUBY:
both of us.. its like.. send a kiss here.. hug there.. Cheeeebai.. send emotions..

REN:
haha

RUBY:
Say sweet nothings.. wahahaha

REN:
if not cannot sleep.. (sent the wink "Kiss")

RUBY:
see here we go again..

REN:
hahahahha
yeah man.. If not, it’s like we didn’t say goodnite properly! hahahahaha

RUBY:
if it's just bye, we will take offense
other days when we're out.. we get a kiss from each other.. wahahaha

REN:
this is fucking hilarious

RUBY:
see what we're doing now??? buying time with each other!

REN:
yeah.. miss you.. don't want to let you go

RUBY:
i am fucking sleepy.. and tired.. but still dun wanna click off.. wahaha

REN:
but i know you need sleep.. poor baby got a meeting on a sunday

RUBY:
yeah.. puki needs rest. oooh well.. here's me saying goodnite for real!

REN:
i let you rest, but doesn't mean i'm happy about it

RUBY:
BLOG THIS!

REN:
hehehe.. Okie..

RUBY:
ur so giving! so considerate.. so kind .. so sweet .. so loving.

REN:
yeah.. doesn't change the fact that me miss you LOTS

RUBY:
i know i know. go disturb some koteks.. ur puki needs sleep.

REN:
okie.. nite nite puki.. kiss your pea

RUBY:
Kekeke.. ok. pea says thanks. :)
NITE!

REN:
NITE!

--end--
8/19/2006 11:38:43 PM

COCKtails

Shakespeare once said of alcohol...

“lechery…it provokes and unprovokes; it provokes the desire but it takes away the performance.”

RUBY:
alcohol can do wonders to a good man! :P

REN:
to a woman too

RUBY:
hahaha


REN:
but performances may dip.

RUBY:
haahhaa

RUBY:
yeah.. fuck for the sake of fucking.. hahaha

*REN speaks:
I totally agree that alcohol reduces inhibitions and induces sexual desire.
But there are valid reasons for why you shouldn’t drive under its influence. It impairs your judgment and coordination. While you are still willing to have sex when you‘re shitfaced, you will find yourself less capable of demonstrating your best. So you still think you always fucked pretty good? Remember, alcohol affects perception too.

And also, Sex tends to get more aggressive. Erm…actually, THAT’S okay..

What rubbish am I sprouting.. Forget it. Hit me. Hit me with a whiskey shot.

Or simply, just… HIT ME.

Why Ruby is in PR / Marketing

On MSN last night:

RUBY:
if the chance comes.. i will get into a relationship. In the meantime.. i will fuck.

REN:
I’ll give you permission to push me . If you think it’s right, you have full authority to force the kotek in me.. ok?

RUBY:
OK SET! u know i will! Hmmmm… let me think..

REN:
Haha.. I seem to have a PR manager.
Quality control.
i need to give you a RAISE

RUBY:
YEAHHH! u must!!!


REN:
Ok..

RUBY:
thank you for ur trust in me... :P

REN:
you may go ahead and organize the rape session

RUBY:
YAY! I want to force Mr. C’s kotek down ur throat man!!! BEST!

REN:
Hahaha.. now I’m scared..

RUBY:
scared for wat fuck!!!! Oi! YOU GIVE PERMISSION CANNOT TAKE BACK!!!!!

REN:
can picture you grabbing and stuffing it in my face.. now I’m panicking.

RUBY:
what the hell did i say just now?????

REN:
i was confused… hahaha..

RUBY:
Mr. C. won't mind me touching his cock for a good cause. community service.

REN:
now I’m imagining you pulling him by the kotek.. I’m laughing like mad here..

RUBY:
:P kekekeke.. come out kotekkk… koteeeeeekkkk…

REN:
hahhaha tie with rope.. thinking of you dragging with a leash.

RUBY:
Kekeke.. tie his kotek.. coaching it to stand

REN:
breasts heaving.. fed up like mummy

RUBY:
you! go! go and fuck! teaching son how to fuck.

REN:
hahahhaha take cane ..then you go to the kitchen to cook.. And wait for the fuckers to come out and eat.

RUBY:
where the fuck is my grandson?? the oven better Not be roasting empty! shoot blanks.. i will shoot u! :P waste time!

REN:
Woah.. So what if there’s no grandson.. lock the kotek and the puki in the room?

RUBY:
yeah u, mr C and his kotek.

REN:
Woah.. Fuck till it breaks.

RUBY:
don't break la

REN:
yeah.. if not I suffer.. you cry for me man ..then you must let me borrow winandro then. Like you‘ll let me fuck him..

RUBY:
for the sake of impregnating yes. for pleasure.. i will fuck u first. wahahaha

REN:
tell winandro.. “even I haven't fucked my puki, you want to fuck MY puki? noooooooooooooooooooooooooo..... “

RUBY:
waahaha :P winandro.. first choice. i shall keep my puki for him..

REN:
yes i approve. He is fuck worthy. i want your puki to see that kotek. And I expect your post-fuck report on my desk the following morning.

RUBY:
SET!

Borderline Lesbians Part VIII

REN and RUBY in BQ bar:

REN:
Think I should ask for SP’s number (cute waitress)?

RUBY:
Shut up! I’m sitting right here!

REN:
Hahaha.. I would do her.. She’s not gorgeous, but she IS a cutie pie.

RUBY:
YOU HAVEN’T EVEN DONE ME YET, AND YOU WANT TO DO ANOTHER GIRL?? FUCK YOU!!

REN:
Hahahahaha.. BABY! You know I love you…

RUBY:
Shut up! Don’t talk to me! You haven’t done THIS puki (pointing to her puki) and you want to fuck another one.. KOTEK you know you!!!

{After turning away a persistent babi kotek,
After turning away an aussie kotek, (obviously both weren’t great)
After a free beer from the bar,
We decided to head on to One-Night-Stand Club}

RUBY:
Ok, I let you kiss SP goodnight. SIGH!!!!

REN:
Hehehehehe…

RUBY:
GO ON! GO AHEAD! PUKI YOU!!

(SP was balancing a small tower of glasses when we were walking out. I tapped her on the shoulder. She turned around. I stepped closer to her, wrapped my lower arm around her neck, and gave her a firm kiss goodbye on her cheek.. It was sweet. )

When Ruby and I walked out….

REN:
SPAZZZZZZZZ! Hahahahaha!

RUBY:
FUCK YOU LAH!!! Don’t you touch me!!!

*REN speaks:

Psychological research proved that most homophobes are likely to be closet homosexuals. Well, I don’t know about that, but I do believe it when experts say that everyone questions their sexuality at least once in their lifetime.

I stopped asking men for their take on this, because ALL of them just quivered at the idea. Come on, I am not saying that you ARE gay, or that you HAVE doubts about your orientation. Fine if it’s not for you. All I’m saying is that, you must have at one point, no matter how brief, even for a split second, entertained the thought. And if you haven’t, you are now. Haha..

Me? I wonder sometimes…

Am I Bi just because

1) I found Ellen Degeneres oddly attractive when her sitcom “Ellen” made its debut in 1994. And I rushed home from school to catch the “coming-out” episode.

2) I sensed Anne Heche, Ellen’s ex (below) was straight when their relationship was much publicized..

And I think Portia De Rossi (Ellen’s present girlfriend-below) is a lucky bitch.


3) I felt that my friend’s girlfriend could be someone who could nudge me to the dark side (physically) if she was lesbian.

4) I get sexual lesbian dreams.

5) My ex boyfriend insisted I had repressed lesbian tendencies.

6) Another ex-boyfriend reminded me that having sexual relations with a woman was still considered cheating.

7) Women approached me for sex.

Why I conclude that I’m straight as hell:

1) Women’s emotional issues are too much for me to handle.

2) Women play more games than men, which I find fucking annoying.

3) However much I find lesbian sex arousing, I just know I’m not going to enjoy it as much as I do in my head.

4) I am even pickier over women than men..

5) I would prefer to have kids of my own.

6) A Man’s firm lips over a woman’s soft ones any day.

7) My puki tenses up in the presence of a man I’m sexually attracted to.. It never throbs that way with a woman.

***Who am I kidding… I STILL LOVE MEN.
And ALL they have to offer..

What makes Ren and Ruby Spaz-at-first-sight

Dress Sense:
RUBY - white shirt, Bermudas, and loafers
REN - black shirt, jeans, linen pants, sweatshirts.

Color:
REN - a shade that is not stereotypical of any race.
RUBY - white skin

Accent:
REN - Anything but Babi
RUBY - Aussie

Hair:
REN - dark, short, straight, neat
RUBY - none. (yeah, baldies are her latest fetish)

Age:
REN - as long as it’s legal
RUBY - old enough to be her dad

Personality:
REN - strong silent type. Chatty, but a good listener.
RUBY - extreme bad boy or downright nerd

Alcohol Capacity:
REN - I need a fairly good drinker. But we develop a natural high with each other even before our first sips.
RUBY - passes out on his second.

Physical Appearance:
REN - big eyes, sharp nose, and an incredible smile
RUBY - LARDASS.

Language:
REN - English-speaking
RUBY - anyone who took English as a foreign language.

*REN speaks:
Note to self - Wear helmet and padding to cushion Ruby’s blows the next time I meet her. Any resulting injury will be worth it though. I am already dying of laughter anyway! HAHAHAHA!!!

"To do" lists - slightly closer to reality (continued...)

REN speaks:
I just cancelled on Ruby.
She was in a mega maneating mode.. and I just wasn't up for anything today.
Sorry Puki.. :P
What happened to Teddy you ask? well, I'll let her tell THAT story.

*I went to BQ bar last night with a bunch of friends last Tuesday without Ruby.

REN:
rugby boy was wearing a white shirt yesterday.. (Ruby spazzes at any guy with a white shirt. well, almost.) Your fucking fetish! i spazzed on your behalf ..haha.. bq was PACKED!

(and no, Rugby Boy looks NOTHING like this guy on the left.)

RUBY:
cibai man u.. make me miss out on rugby boy white shirt.. shit man!

REN:
SP smiled at me. (=Sweet Puki. cute waitress at BQ bar) i think i will make a move on her.

RUBY:
EEEE dun make me slap u... sneaking behind my back .still can tell me!
i will wear my slut dress next time!
i am soooo horny ..ooohh so horny... horny horny horny!
i need a strong aussie man! my puki loves aussies!


REN:
I should change my taste.. My preferences are fucking hard to find. I want babi, but not babi-like, Milo but not milo-like, ang mo but not angmo-like..
Kotek.... i tell you, if i ever spot one.. i will kidnap and marry..
no, kidnap, FUCK then marry.
Hahaha..

RUBY:
i know where to find my aussies..
yeah.. u need to rethink ur preferences
rugby boy.. rugby boy.. how can i fuck thee? let me count the ways...
i have a friend on the other conversation line.. asking me if i would piss on someone..
i had a man who wanted to pee on me once. i walked off.. i said.. one squirt of urine gets on me.. that's it!

REN:
Yuck!!! that’s one thing I wouldn’t do..
i'm staring at lardass’ (a friend of mine whom Ruby said she would definitely fuck) pictures i have no idea why u wanna fuck him.
i can't even do a force-fuck.


RUBY:
i want a fat fuck.. wahh my wish list is getting longer and longer..
1. Winandro 2. Lardass 3. Fat fuck 4. Baldie 5. Aussie men

REN:
no. 2 is Lardass?? FUCK YOU!
Ok, draw up list for me

RUBY:
i think... for u.. lets see..

REN:
gimme practical ones

RUBY:
i need u to fuck Mr. C first.. then go on from there . wahaha dun wanna dissapoint the poor fuck!

REN:
you're so good to him.. always looking out for him eh.. Hahah..

RUBY:
YEAH MANNN! ALWAYS LOOK OUT for him..
Ok, so it’s 1. Mr. C 2. Calvin 3. BC
Mine 1. Winandro 2. Dennis 3. lardass
all cocks are overseas!!

REN:
PUKI U! you STILL want lardass.

RUBY:
yeah! for some reason i wanna keep him. Hahaa . for some reason beyond my comprehension.. i want to fuck lardass. but Winandro is definately on my list

REN:
and Calvin no. 2 for me? Why Calvin?

RUBY:
Dunno...

REN:
anyway, Winandro... THAT ONE i APPROVE! DO IT! DO IT! DO IT!

RUBY:
Dennis, i wanna do a fuck once and see how it is! bf i didn't fuck. must finish the whole chapter!

REN:
but not as important as number ONE!!

RUBY:
yeah!!! one of them better marry me man! KOTEK!

“To do” lists

REN speaks:
Religious followers of the comedy series ‘Friends’ must remember the episode of the “freebie” list. Whereby the friends make up a list of 5 people whom they can sleep with without anyone getting mad.

I thought it'll be fun if i come up with my own brand.
I limited it to Hollywood hotties. otherwise, I would have trouble cutting down the list to just 5.
I also learned my lesson from Ross. Since they’re not set in stone, they’ll NEVER be laminated.

Yeah, I got a list of women too.

1. Denzel Washington

2. George Clooney

3. Jude Law

4. Brandon Routh

5. Richard Gere


1. Elizabeth Hurley

2. Michele Pfieffer

3. Diane Lane

4. Jennifer Aniston

5. Marisa Tomei


So I made my list
I checked it twice
Don’t fucking care who’s naughty or nice
But who’s coming to town?

(in the words Rachael Green to Ross, "Yeah, 'cause that's why you won't get Isabella Rosselini, geography.)

Borderline Lesbians Part VII

At BQ bar:

RUBY spazing out over Rugby Boy (a regular/possibly a co-owner of BQ bar):
Horneeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

REN:
I don’t see it man.. Not doing it for me.. Ordinary whitey.

RUBY:
Shut up your face! Me lerrrrrrrrv…

REN:
Nope, no Spaz. I can see the quality of Fuckability though. Go. You may fuck. I’ll let you.

RUBY:
Yay!!!!!

(waitress serves up)

REN:
That chick is kinda cute. Body is so-so.. But cute.. I’d do her. I’m naming her SP. Stands for SWEET PUKI.

RUBY:
(gets angry)
I’M HERE, AND YOU DARE SAY THAT!!! MY PUKI IS SWEET TOO! RUDE!!!

REN:
Hahahaha!!!! That’s true.. Your puki IS sweet. Well, there is no kotek here to spaz over. The chick is looking mighty fine now..

RUBY:
SHUT UP YOUR FACE!
(pointing to her own face) ME ANGRY! YOU HAVEN’T EVEN DONE ME, AND YOU WANT TO DO THAT CHICK! JEALOUS!!!

RUBY and REN:
Hahahahaha…

(SP comes over with a plate of calamari)

REN:
Erm.. No, we didn’t order this.

SP:
It’s on the house from the manager.

RUBY and REN:
Oh!!! Free again! Thank you!!!

(SP smiles)

REN:
Woohoo!!! I can’t even count the number of times we got freebies man. This started actually, the FIRST time we patronized this bar. We weren’t even regulars! We’ve gotten free wines, beers, whiskies and now… food.

RUBY:
Yeah man! And then.................

(SP walks across the bar.)

RUBY:
OI!!!!! PUKI YOU!!!!! DON’T THINK I DIDN’T CATCH YOU CHECKING HER OUT!!!

REN:
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Superman Returns-Critical Review. S-word style..

REN speaks:

Which girl wouldn't want to be swept away by Superman?

If you don’t,… think about it. Think about the sex.
Mr. Man of STEEL, BUNS of STEEL, COCK of steel…will be fucking you in mid air.
Oh.... and the Speed… speed will be a good thing in this case.. as long as kryptonite is not in the room. You’ll never have to worry about him going limp, ever.

His laser eyes will blast through the puki!



But not to worry, ‘cos he, can BLOW. His super ice breath will put the flames out, before firing up another explosive O. Hahahaha..

No wonder Lois was still hung up on him after 5 years of abandonment!!!

The love triangle... no, actually the romantic sub-plot turned into a love square..
(Lois, Superman, Richard, and let's not forget... Clark. )

These characters actually represent a few real-life human traits and the choices people face with in their love lives.

let's analyze:

Superman:

-workaholic: reporter by day, world savior by night.
-he never wanted Lois to love him for his superpowers…
but for who he really is.. i.e. Clark Kent.

Clark Kent:

-When is HE ever going to learn that monosyllabic conversations and wistful looks wasn’t going to help him get any action?

Richard White:

-living with the fact that he might be second best.

Lois Lane:
-choices, choices, choices... what should she do?
-obsessed with Superman and blind to Clark's advances, she settles for Richard.
it was probably the smartest thing to do. Settle for something real, even if it probably means less-than-amazing sex. But she remains apprehensive about marrying Richard. Why? Maybe because she was cursed with good cock 5 years ago.

If I could talk to Lois, this is what I would tell her..

- Girl, it’s time for you to see beyond the glitz and glamour of being a superhero's wife. Sure the fuck was great. But you’ll be working around his schedule. And if ever you get the rare chance to heat things up in the bedroom, the workaholic gets a call from work and flies off.



- while settling for Richard might be more stable and secure, realize that there might be consequences. Trouble is, you know better. You know how better cock can be. So trust me, cheating is likely. Well, you kissed Superman, didn’t you?



- And honey, did you ever think that you might have overlooked someone? He could be just hiding behind a pair of glasses.



He once gave up everything he had for you (Superman II). But MORE importantly, if you gave him AND yourself a chance, this unassuming friend of yours could jolly well be endowed with a similar explosive package.



Open your eyes Lois, Open your eyes…

Borderline Lesbians Part VI

(continued)
2nd August, Last Thursday, BQ bar:

(Wilson goes to the washroom after awhile)

RUBY:
He soooooooooooo wants to fuck you.

REN:
Shut up.

RUBY:
You guys should just do it already. Do it! Do it! Do it!

REN:
Nah.. I will never do him. Told you, at this point, I can only think of 4 Fuckable faces. And I need to be able to fuck the face. Mr. FF (Fantasy Fuck), Mr B, Mr. C, and you. Hahahahaha..

RUBY:
Yeah!!! I’m so honored!!! Thank you!

REN:
oh well.. 2 married, one’s not in the country, and the other is a fucking female.

RUBY:
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

(Wilson comes back)

RUBY:
Shall we all go to one-night-stand? (club)

WILSON and REN:
Sure, let’s go.

(Ladies Night at One night stand club in Clarke Quay)

(Ruby and I got 4 free ladies-night drink coupons each!)

REN:
Wow!!

RUBY:
I know! That’s it, we’re coming here every Thursday, why should we spend money at all when we can get 4 here?

REN:
Yeah!

(Ruby went nuts in the club.. She drank faster than usual and was striking up conversations with whities.)

REN:
Slow down babe..

RUBY:
Fucking 4 months I haven’t gone clubbing! Fucking 4 months I didn’t grind against anyone! Don’t tell me to slow down!

REN:
Hahaha.. Ok, ok..

(I stood facing by the bar, perfectly happy enjoying my freebies, and chatted with Wilson.

(Ruby pulls me so hard from behind.)

RUBY:
WHAT THE FUCK YOU TWO STANDING AND TALKING FOR? LET’S DANCE!!

REN:
You go ahead and grind babe.. I’m really enjoying myself just drinking here.

RUBY:
WHAT LAH!!!

(few minutes later, she pulls me to dance)

RUBY:
PUKI!!! I LOVE YOU!!!

REN:
ME LOVE YOU TOO!!!!

(we danced, we kissed)

WILSON:
Let’s see some tongue!!!

REN:
You wouldn’t be the first one to ask. Geez..

RUBY:
Yeah! Why are men such suckers for women kissing?

WILSON:
I’m gonna take off soon. I’m gone, and I’m tired..

RUBY:
What lah this one..

REN:
Let’s not bother… come here..

(we dance and she whispers to me)

RUBY:
You two should really just fuck already.

REN:
It‘s not going to happen Rube..

RUBY:
Why lah!!!! Stand and talk for what fuck!

REN:
It will never happen. I won‘t do it.

RUBY:
Ah ya!!! What you want woman!!!!

(she pushed me on Wilson and forced me to grind up against him)

REN:
(I took a step back) no Rube..

RUBY:
Ah ya!!!

(she did a little erotic dance for me.. and somehow we knew we were going to kiss. We did.)

WILSON:
Woah!!!!!!

REN:
Yeah.. Not so tired anymore eh? Don’t wanna go home no more eh?

WILSON:
No no no!!! not tired at all!

RUBY and REN:
Hahahahahaha!

(we continue to dance.. I cuddled Ruby and fondled her breasts. Again.. )

RUBY:
I don’t know why I always let you grab my boobs.

REN:
Don’t act like you don’t like it.

RUBY:
HAHAHA! Yeah! Do it! Do it!

REN:
I’m just helping you out.. You nympho need to be felt up more often.

RUBY:
Yeah! Yeah!

(I kiss her ear)

RUBY:
NONONONO!!! Dangerous lah!!!

(we were joking and fooling around when I grabbed her ass with my left hand, and swiftly bent down to feel her legs from under her dress with my right. It was kinda of an accident.. i guess i'm used to koteks.. which are always a little higher than where her puki was. I didn’t realize my hands reached her puki!!!)

(I quickly retreated and stood up straight. My hand was still raised, with palm up, my eyeballs almost fell out of their sockets!!!)

REN:
WHAT THE FFFFFFFFFFFUCK!!!! (my fingers were damp!!!!)

RUBY:
(slightly embarrassed) Hahahahaha!!

RUBY and REN:
HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

(we couldn’t even say anything for a few seconds!!)

REN:
WHAT THE FFFFFFFFFFFUCK!!!!

RUBY:
I TOLD YOU!!! WE’RE TREADING ON DANGEROUS WATERS REN!!!

(we had a quick discussion and decided we had to try to stop. Because turning lesbian on each other wasn’t that improbable after all.)

RUBY and REN:
HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

(I figured since I had puki on me, I might as well find out how it smelt. I held my hand up to my face.)

REN:
FUCK! YOU SMELL GOOD!!!

RUBY:
HAHAHAHA! OF COURSE!!!

REN:
DO YOU SPRAY PERFUME ON IT BEFORE YOU GO OUT OR WHAT?? IT’S FUCKING SCENTED!!!

RUBY:
HAHAHA!

Borderline Lesbians Part V

(continued..)

WILSON:
Have you guys watched the L-Word? (lesbian drama series)



RUBY and REN:
HAHAHAHA!! We fucking bonded on the series!

WILSON:
I like that one who works in the coffee house.

REN:
Yeah! Marina! Thank you! Finally!
EVERYONE else likes shane. Don’t get me wrong… shane’s fucking hot and all.. I would do her for sure, but I’ll be a bigger sucker for Marina.

WILSON:
Yeah….

RUBY:
I still like Shane.

*REN speaks:
I realized there are a few similarities between our preferences and our own personalities.

I lifted these descriptions from the net:


Shane McCutcheon
- hair stylist
- highly sexual, known for fucking possibly everyone
- heart-breaker
- rebellious , hard-edged .


Marina Ferrer
- exotic owner of the Planet, the local gay hangout coffee shop.
- home wrecker (introduces a married woman, Jenny to a life- style she never knew existed)
- extremely private about her life.

*REN speaks:
So what do you think Rube? Kinda comparable, aint it?


(to be continued...)

Borderline Lesbians Part IV

(continued)
3rd August, Thursday, 7pm...



RUBY rushes over to BQ Bar:
PUKI!!!! (kisses me hello)
I don’t want to kiss on your cheek because I have really glossy lips now.

REN:
You just want to kiss me on the lips again..

RUBY:
Yeah! Hahahaha!
GUESS WHAT??? I WAS VIOLATED!!

REN:
Erm.. Am I supposed to be outraged, or elated for you? Because you're wearing a big smile!!!

RUBY:
Hahahahaha! Me like! Me like! Some kotek pressed the emergency button on the train, and this lady fell on me and grabbed my breast. SPAZ!

REN:
Hahahaha.. Congratulations on the violation.

RUBY:
Yeah! Hahahahaha!

REN:
One kotek babi friend of mine (Wilson) might join later.

RUBY:
oh!!! Old Cock???

REN:
No, I didn’t do him.

RUBY:
But he wants to fuck you right??

REN:
(zips lips)

RUBY:
Yeah! Do it! Do it!

(few drinks, and a free round from the bar later…, Wilson joined us.)

(a few minutes after introducing them…)

RUBY:
Wilson, do we look like lesbians?

WILSON:
(without hesitation) Yes.

RUBY and REN:
HAHAHAHA…
(and mind you, we weren’t even fondling.. We were seated across from each other)

RUBY:
And we look like a hot lesbo couple right?

WILSON:
Oh.. Yeah..

RUBY:
See Ren? I told you we look lesbian. Would you pick us up Wilson?

WILSON:
I would. It can go both ways. Either men wouldn’t because you’re lesbians, or he WOULD because he wants to get in on some of the action.

REN:
Yeah.. We’ve gotten that offer before. Hahahahaha!

WILSON:
So Ren, you’re lesbian now or what..

REN:
Why not.. My market has increased two-fold.

WILSON:
AWWWRIGHT!

(to be continued...)